A letter from your cashier,

I am a cashier.  However, when I fill out forms that ask me for my occupation, I write "student" because I am not about to write down that I am a cash register operator by profession.   But at the moment, cash register operating pays the bills so that is what I am.  I actually really enjoy my job, I work with a lot of people that I like the company of and I get to talk talk talk to people all day long.

This is my most frequent conversation.
Me: Hey! How are you today?
Them: I'm great! How are you?
Me: I'm alright.
Them: Just alright?
Me: Yes.

Sometimes people don't want to chit chat and the conversation is as follows:
Me: Hey How are you today?
Them: Fine. Thank you.
Me: Okaaaay then.

I've had a pretty terrible bout of cold/allergies lately, so my conversations have mainly centered around that.  But sometimes people feel the need to explain their purchases to me.  One woman who was buying like fifteen packets of balloons told me how it was her son's birthday the next morning and she left all of her balloons that she bought at work.  I thought that was sweet and I am genuinely interested in most people's lives.   

This is me

 A lot of customers come up to my register proclaiming "This must be the most random assortment that you've ever seen."  No sir, your purchase of pens, razors and toilet paper isn't random.  The guy that brought up rope, duct tape and some surgical masks raised some red flags though.

11 Things that bother me as your cashier:
1. When the item doesn't scan and you say, "must be free!" No. It's not free.  Stop. Also I guarantee that I've heard that five times today.
2. When you read my name on my name tag and address me by my name.  I know you're trying to be nice, but it's kind of creepy.  
3. When you place all of your things ON TOP of the scanner.  How am I supposed to scan your stuff if the object that I use to scan your items is covered by your items?
4. When you have twenty articles of clothing, you express that you do not want the hangers and then watch me struggle to take all of the hangers off. AND THEN you tap your foot impatiently because it's taking me so long. 
5. This one might just be me, but it really bothers me when people ask for bags for tiny items that could fit into a pocket.  Wasteful. 
6. When the light on my lane is clearly off and I am clearly trying to clean up my space and people come to my line.  Respect the light people!
7. It doesn't bother me one bit when people are on the phone, but if you completely ignore my, "Hello, how are you?" you are rude.
8. When something was on sale last week and you want a sale on it now.  Sorry, that's not how that works, I wish it was.
9.  Arguing about the wording on the sign.  I didn't write the sign, someone else wrote the sign and I'M SURE that they wrote it that way to mislead you, but they did it for a reason and it is just my job to enforce the sign.  Sorry.  
10.  Asking for $150 cash back during the first 10 minutes that the store is open.  Seriously? Use your brain. 
11.  When you reach over and rip off your own receipt.  I do not have much power in my job, but one of the teeny tiny bits of responsibility that I have is to rip off the receipt.  When you take that from me... I have nothing.  Also I have to resist the urge to slap your hand.  So stop that. 

I feel like a lot of responses to this post will be like, "You get paid to do your job" but honestly, most of the things that I just listed are common courtesy and common sense.  

I honestly like my job and 99.9% of customers but this just turned into a rant, but honestly, some of these things needed to be said.  Sorry that I'm not sorry.  And remember, the cashier ringing up your condoms and lube feels just as awkward as you do. 

ciao ciao -K